Your Invisible Army

In the end, the only one fighting is you... There is no one else... you are alone in your army of invisible soldiers. No one else wants to fight your battles.

you can't "make up" people just to try and make your argument valid.
Here is the PERFECT example, and the reason why I did this entry.

 : " you're taking things too fast, besides, everyone is really concerned and they ALL don't think you should be in a new relationship just yet, we all talked about it."

Who? hmm? I have a multitude of people messaging me personally saying how wonderful it is that I've moved on since the abusive relationship. It's been 3+ months since splitting from that situation.
3 months is like a blink of the eye to some people, but to me ; I feel healed, and ready to start something new. I deserve to.
If you're going to say something is a bad idea, and that "everyone" is concerned, you might want to list off some names or at least tell me when exactly you spoke to your people.


I just don't understand why people think that every little move I make concerns them, and that they should all get involved and tell me how to go about my life. Am I swimming in a lake full of leeches again?
time to bring out the bag of salt.


But when it comes to my new partner... well, that is a whole other story.
People can say the stupidest things if they want to, like that they believe he'll stray or that he won't treat me right, or that he'll get too clingy etc etc. I really don't care. Let me worry about any of those non-existent problems for now, okay?

we connect.
I turn my head for a kiss, and find that his lips are already waiting, patiently for mine.
I reach out for an embrace and his arms are already open.
I laugh and he laughs with me, for the same reasons.
I get upset and I can SEE the concern, feel the emotions come off of him.
We are in tune with each other.
When I'm upset about something (mainly the issue I blogged about in the last 2 entries) he just knows.
He knows how to encourage me to smile, how to encourage me to cheer up.
I feel safe when I'm with him, I feel free.
I am able to sing loudly without feeling any sort of judgement.
I am able to dance freely, contemporary, without feeling nervous.
I feel free.

I feel like I can really open up, and that's something I've never been able to do so quickly.
Ever meet someone and instantly feel like you know everything about them?
That's what it was like over a year ago when I first met my boyfriend.
He threw paper balls from straw wrappers at my face and kept giving me nudgies when he walked by me, and I knew instantly that we clicked.
We joked about how he'd kick my ass in a Halo 4 competition ( he most definitely would)
We talked about all sorts of nerd things ( I'm a bit of a geek, he's a full out nerd <3 )
such as Star Wars, Big Bang Theory, The Pros and Cons of George Lucas selling his entire legacy to Disney ( I'm not pleased about it but whatever ), random science things such as Periodic Table of Elements puns
( hey girl, are you made of copper and titanium? because you are CuTe ! )
We talked about a lot of things within that 2 hour time span, and I realized just how much we had in common.

Any time that I had run into him over the last year, he always gave me a random hug followed by a cute happy squeak noise ( I love it!!!) And quite often he'd stop his previous conversation with his friends just to ask how my day way if I happened to walk by him downtown.
It's the littlest things, It's always been the way he asks me how I'm doing, the way he tilts his head sideways to show that he actually takes interest in what I'm saying, the way he hugs me, with such comfort to it.
The way he looks at me, the way he smiles.

Those kind of connections aren't common.
I think we have something here. What? well, I know exactly what but that's not for anyone else to know right now.  I am gushing happiness right now, it literally is just bouncing off of me and onto everything around me, except for one particular leech in my life that thinks my relationship isn't a great idea.


The great thing about being an adult in an adult relationship? It's our business, no one else's.
If I decide to visit until 4am, that's up to me so long as I have a babysitter and I'm not sleeping all day.
If I decide to kiss him for 3 hours straight, that's up to us.
If we decide to drop the " L Bomb" on each other after a month, that's up to us.
If we decide to go all the way on the first day or before making it official, that's up to us.

You're not kissing either of us, you're not humping either of us, you're not in love with either of us ( I should hope not), you're not in a relationship with us... so why do you think you should have any control over it?

That's the beautiful thing.

I mean yes, I wish I could literally have EVERYONE'S support and happiness on this.
That'd be really cool to have everyone I know on the face of this planet being like " I'm so happy for you"
But some people out there are just terrible little ass hats, so that's not going to happen, however a majority of you seem to be happy about my ability to move on.

I have a great job, I have a silly little son who is doing great ( he and my boyfriend have been good pals for quite some time ), and I have my head on my shoulders. Yes, there are still people out there telling me how to run my life, what they think of the choices I've made etc.

I am happy, I am healthy, I am strong.
I am being a good mother, I am being a good provider.

Nothing else I do should be anyone else's business.

xoxo, the "stayput" Heart <3